Reproductive organs and technology

So like where the hell have I been? I know my fans are wondering, you know the usual crew, the old gang of mine, hangin' out jokers & tokers, friends who support me like a jock strap. I can facebook any one of these people and ask, "What would you think about me writing a blog about my testicles?" And she'll tell me. I say she because it's the kind of question you can only ask a woman. If my female friends and readers are cool with it, won't be offended, I know it's a go.

And while we're on the subject of testicles, penises and vaginas, perhaps in my absence these past few weeks, people have been wondering why I haven't written about Caitlyn Jenner. Then there's the horrible stuff of this world my readers have grown accustomed to my weighing in on -- racist murders in a church, the Confederate flag. Then, there's the downfall of the American Empire -- same sex marriage.

I just got so damn sick and tired of posting on my old blog poster with its limited designs and heavy-handed way of owning your ass, by which, I mean everything you post -- text, images, videos -- being Their Property. I looked for some other platform. Technology-wise, I'm lacking. I kept bugging my wife, Maria, to help me.

"Why can't you stay where you know what you're doing?" she complained. "I hate your blog. It's the bane of my existence."

"Yeah, well a lot of people don't know it, but my blog is famous and I want to present a nice place for readers."

"You're not giving them a freakin' lavatory," she said.

But I begged and pleaded until she helped me. When I asked her to help me again, she said, "Can't you do anything for yourself. Just experiment on your own. That's how I learned."

So I did.

Anyhow, this ain't a new blog, just a continuation of the old blog, but on a different site. Haven't figured out how to move my old blogs here to a new home yet. Perhaps Maria will help me with that.

For now, here goes. I'm not offended by Caitlyn Jenner's gender change, but getting into the Kardashian family and signing on for a reality show, what's up with that?

The day that horrible shooting took place in a historic black church, I knew it wouldn't take long for the Fox "News" heads (et. al) to exploit the tragedy, to accuse Obama of enflaming racial tensions in this country (which actually, they do) and go on about how we really don't have a gun problem. Just people killing people, that's all. They lived up to every bit of my expectations.

I heard someone at the Backwater Bar & Grill go on about how people are making race relations "20 times worse" by bitching about the Confederate flag. Yeah, if only those black people would have different perceptions.

As for the Supreme Court decision, what can I say? If two consenting adults want to go down on each other, that's their business. So God's going to bring down his wrath on America for gay marriage? We committed genocide against American Indians, kidnapped Africans and sold them into slavery, raped, tortured and killed people and God's going to punish us over a piece of paper?

And since I always like to talk about sex (it's how we got here), there's Bristol Palin. I knew all the time she was having sex. I mean, she was dating a Marine. Her stupid mom has blamed Obama for out-of-wedlock pregnancies -- what with all the pot, porn and alcohol (Remember that bar brawl the Palin family got into?). But Barack didn't stick his penis in Bristol's vagina. Her Marine boyfriend, the guy Pres. Obama awarded the Medal of Honor to, did that.

But what the hell? She's an attractive young woman enjoying sex. Good for her. I still think she should return the money people paid for all her abstinence talks, though.

Well I should get my ass 'outa here. Must go to work, but just remember I love the shit out of you & see you later.